Re: not posting

I have not been posting in more than a week. Asked why, the answer is simple:

Cowardice.

A friend of mine's father died last week. This is a pretty good friend, who has helped me a lot, several times. I haven't ever had a parent die. I don't really know what to say. His father died unexpectedly. I was invited to the funeral but couldn't go. I was invited to the wake but couldn't go. I tried to call, but didn't get through.

This person is one of maybe 4 people on earth who know about this blog and my alias. SOOOOOO, if I post, and he checks, he... completely irrational, I know. He's got bigger things to worry about. I know.

I had intended to write an email, because I write pretty well. I procrastinated, and now my late email will be obviously late. So now I'm all fucking sorts of stuck. I don't know what to say, and even if I did, I would be saying it late, and I'm scared to say the wrong thing on time, much less late. So that's why I haven't been around.

That and working too much.